Monday, December 5, 2011

Diary Continued

Day 6: The walls are closing in. I've ripped out the garden, done laundry, washed dishes . . . it's morning and I should be on my bike. The making of Animal House is on. During the documentary, if you could call it that, A&E continues to run commercials for a new show called "Lady Hoggers." I suspect that the end of the world is at hand. A show following female hog hunters? Scratch that. That statement was sexist. A SHOW FOLLOWING HOG HUNTERS???? I'm slipping into madness and the rest of the world appears to have a head start. The question that taunts me is this . . . Is the world literally about to end, or is it already over and I just noticed because I stopped peddling my bike? Highland Forrest with the Brown Dog is the only logical solution. Running is 'cross training right? It's ok if a heroin addict does cocaine while trying to kick the habit right? Say yes. Say yes.

Day 7: Wait, I lost a day somewhere. I think it's day 8. It's dark too early and light too late, which doesn't even make sense. There are only 7 scratches on the cave wall. Regardless it's Monday. Monday's are always a recovery day so today feels normal. Made even more normal by the fact that I'm looking at the walls of a Hampton Inn room with the warm glow of an Applebee's painting the very same walls in multicolor lights. Mmmm Home Sweet Home. Applebees . . . no Crapplebees . . . let's just call it Pooplebees. This is all a great way to get excited about riding the trainer all winter. I'm literally excited to ride the trainer. Mission accomplished.

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